To All The Single Girls
Friday, February 12, 2016
Valentines day is just around the corner, and although I don't celebrate it, I thought it would be the perfect time to write this post. If I'm completely honest with you, I've been waiting for months to post this... So here we go!
I've been noticing a really surprising and troubling trend among Christian girls. I don't know about you, but many seem to think the biggest goal God has them is to get married and have a family. There are tons of books about how to find your husband, what to do when you've found him, and the dating/courtship controversy has exploded the past few years.
For many people, it has become their life goal to get married and have children. Now before I continue, I would like to clarify that I'm not against marriage. I don't think that it is wrong to have that desire, and I know God has called many women to be mothers and wives. But that is not what He wants us to be focused on! I can't find any verse in the Bible that says, "Women and girls, your entire goal in life is to find a husband. You cannot be fulfilled, or doing anything for me unless that happens, and you should be worrying about it." In fact I've found the exact opposite.
"There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband." 1 Corinthians 7:34
That's a pretty strong verse! Paul says doesn't say that the unmarried woman is looking for a husband, but caring for the things of the Lord! That is exactly what we should be doing. We should spend this time getting to know the Lord, growing in Him, and doing His work. When, and if we get married, we'll be busy, taking care of our husbands, running a house hold, looking after children, etc. We won't be free to go on a mission trip, volunteer, or do some of the other things God might be calling us to do.
Instead of constantly moping around waiting for our 'soul mate', wishing we had someone to love us, making sure everyone know that we're 'single and ready to mingle', we should be thankful. Yes thankful, thankful for being single. That's the opposite of the world's idea, but it is true. God gave us this time in our live to serve Him, to grow in Him, to be fulfilled in Him. It's not a time to spend our days envying others who are in relationships, or counting the number of friends who are getting married and wondering what's taking your man so long.
It is not up to you to find a husband. God will bring him in His time, He is more than able to do so. He walked on water, and He rose dead to life, He healed lepers, I think that finding a husband for you won't be too much for Him. But the point is, that you don't need to worry about it. We need to trust God, lay all our hopes at His feet, and then leave them there. We can't bring them with us, because then we'll still be trying to bring them about ourselves, and that will end in disaster.
Where do you think you will find fulfillment in life? Who will complete you? It's not a husband. It is Christ who can give you fulfillment, who will complete your personality. A husband is supposed to compliment us, but he's not necessary.
Now I'm going to suggest something that might seem even more shocking to you. You might never get married. God might not have it in your future to get married, He might have a completely different story written out for you. And if that is the case it will be wonderful. There have been many women who did great things for God who were single.
Amy Carmichael worked in India, saving many girls and women from horrible situations, and winning souls for Christ. Gladys Aylward was a missionary in China, and lead hundreds of children through the mountains, all the while dodging enemy soldiers, and being very sick herself. Mary Slessor worked in Africa, saving hundreds of twins from death, and bringing so many to Christ. Rachel Saint lived among the Aucus, a savage group in South America who killed her own brother. She brought them all to Christ. All of these women were single, and wouldn't have done the work they did if they had spent their time moping about their single state, and looking for husbands.
I guess the point of this post is to encourage you. Even though it might seem tempting to you to mope around, and spend your single days looking for a husband, that's not what you were made to do. Enjoy your life, spend more time with your Saviour and doing His will, and be thankful! Trust in Him and He will work your life out perfectly.
Instead of constantly moping around waiting for our 'soul mate', wishing we had someone to love us, making sure everyone know that we're 'single and ready to mingle', we should be thankful. Yes thankful, thankful for being single. That's the opposite of the world's idea, but it is true. God gave us this time in our live to serve Him, to grow in Him, to be fulfilled in Him. It's not a time to spend our days envying others who are in relationships, or counting the number of friends who are getting married and wondering what's taking your man so long.
It is not up to you to find a husband. God will bring him in His time, He is more than able to do so. He walked on water, and He rose dead to life, He healed lepers, I think that finding a husband for you won't be too much for Him. But the point is, that you don't need to worry about it. We need to trust God, lay all our hopes at His feet, and then leave them there. We can't bring them with us, because then we'll still be trying to bring them about ourselves, and that will end in disaster.
Where do you think you will find fulfillment in life? Who will complete you? It's not a husband. It is Christ who can give you fulfillment, who will complete your personality. A husband is supposed to compliment us, but he's not necessary.
Now I'm going to suggest something that might seem even more shocking to you. You might never get married. God might not have it in your future to get married, He might have a completely different story written out for you. And if that is the case it will be wonderful. There have been many women who did great things for God who were single.
Amy Carmichael worked in India, saving many girls and women from horrible situations, and winning souls for Christ. Gladys Aylward was a missionary in China, and lead hundreds of children through the mountains, all the while dodging enemy soldiers, and being very sick herself. Mary Slessor worked in Africa, saving hundreds of twins from death, and bringing so many to Christ. Rachel Saint lived among the Aucus, a savage group in South America who killed her own brother. She brought them all to Christ. All of these women were single, and wouldn't have done the work they did if they had spent their time moping about their single state, and looking for husbands.
I guess the point of this post is to encourage you. Even though it might seem tempting to you to mope around, and spend your single days looking for a husband, that's not what you were made to do. Enjoy your life, spend more time with your Saviour and doing His will, and be thankful! Trust in Him and He will work your life out perfectly.
"For I know the thoughts I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end." Jeremiah 29:11Sincerely, Rachel
2 comments
Yes Rachel, I agree with your well presented thoughts. Woman are more than wives and mothers...although I think that those are some of our most important jobs...they are not all we should be aiming for. What we learn, who we are and who we help...those areas of life always need concentrated focus.
ReplyDeleteHello Mrs. Roger,
DeleteThank-you. Yes, I agree that the job of being a mother and wife is a really important! And there is certainly nothing wrong with wanting to be one. I think the problem comes in when girls become obsessed with that, and think that they can't do anything unless they're doing that. God has a time for everything, and the single time of our lives is so important to grow, learn, and do things while we have the time. And if it is God's plan for us to get married then that time of our lives will be just as important when it comes.
Thank-you for commenting!